Our guidos and guidettes are back in the United States! This lady here enjoyed the first episode of what might be the last season of “The Jersey Shore.”

So last week began with no one wanting to room with The Situation! You had to giggle to yourself during that van ride back to the house. I just was waiting for someone to say, “Ha Ha, no one likes you Mike!”

The group gets back into their home and all seven make a run for their rooms. This was right before an entire luggage store worth of bags was wheeled in. They wear skimpy clothing, no underwear and no shirts, how can they all have so much stuff?

Ronnie and Sam are stuck rooming with Mike again. They all walk into the room and we are immediately shown flashbacks of season three. This was last time they lived together. There is no way all three of those beds will stay nicely in that room the entire summer.

The group hits the boardwalk and has a little fun, and of course they have to hit up the T-shirt shop to check their schedule.

"As crazy as that sounds, I can't wait to work again," Pauly says. Who are they kidding? These people don’t REALLY work. My favorite thing to do while they are out is pay attention to the crowds around them. The camera crew tries so hard to cut groups out of the shots to make it look like they are just any other people at the shore.

Their boss asks them to meet up for drinks and when they walk into the bar, SURPRISE! All of their friends and family were there. Vinny gets very emotional. I mean, it’s normal for grown men to cry because they miss their mommy right?

But the big surprise at the party is Snooki’s friend, Ryder, and Mike’s friend, The Unit, are there. If you recall, these are the two witnesses to the cross contamination that went on between Snooki and Mike months prior. Mike almost got a wine bottle to the head last season for exposing Snooki... I wish she had better aim. The two people who could really get her in trouble are in the same room as her boyfriend who she supposedly cheated on.

The network plays up that there could be drama; Unit is going to call her out. But we soon find out that Snooki hides Jionni to smoosh. Unit and Mike then begin their 7th grade sleepover, borrowing clothes and changing in front of each other. They also Axe the sh*t out of their bodies, what they are calling “Gorilla in the Mist.” I’m sorry, but all the body spray in the world is not going to cover up your herpes. The night ends with no love for them, but some for Pauly D! "Whether you're the first man in, or the last man in … Ryd-er."

Little drama aside, we are left with Vinny again missing his family and wanting to go home. I am just curious how many episodes it will take for him to leave. I am very disappointed because I didn’t get enough drunk falling or fighting in the premiere episode.

This season looks like it won’t disappoint. I think we are all in for another season of drunkenness, fighting, new phrases and lots of cuca shots. Buckle up kids; we are in for a wild ride.